70 Funny Shark Jokes
Here are 70 funny shark jokes and the best shark puns to crack you up. These jokes about sharks are great jokes for kids and adults.
Here is our top list of shark dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about sharks, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this shark humor with others.
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Shark puns
Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about sharks that are also awesome shark jokes for adults and kids to be told!
- What does a shark eat for dinner? Whatever it wants.
- What type of sharks do carpenters like? The hammerhead and saw shark.
- What did the shark say to the other shark? There’s some-fin special about you.
- What do you get when you cross a shark with a snowman? Frostbite.
- Did you know that geese kill more humans than sharks each year? To be fair, it’s really hard for geese to kill sharks.
- What did the shark get on her maths test? A sea-minus.
- What do you get from an angry shark? As far away as possible.
- Who’s a shark’s favorite Star Wars character? Chewbacca.
- Would you rather kiss a shark or a jellyfish? A jellyfish, that’s a no-brainer.
- What happened when the shark got famous? He became a starfish.
- What happened to shark who ate keys? It got lock-jaw.
- Why won’t sharks attack lawyers? Professional courtesy.
- Why do sharks live in salt water? Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
- What’s a shark’s favorite type of sandwich? Peanut butter and jellyfish.
- What do you call it when a shark, a crocodile, and a giant spider walk into a bar? A typical day in Australia.
- Why did the shark cross the great barrier reef? To get to the other tide.
- Why didn’t the shark fight the octopus? Because he knew the octopus was well-armed.
- What’s a shark’s favorite game? Hide and go eat.
- What do sharks order at McDonalds? A quarter flounder with cheese.
- Why can’t most sharks read? They are not part of a school.
- Where do sharks go on vacation? Fin-land.
- Where do country music-loving sharks go? Gnashville.
- What do you call a fish that doesn’t have any friends? A loan shark.
- What do sharks do when they have a big choice to make? Chews wisely.
- What happens when you mix a shark and a cow together? I don’t know but I wouldn’t want to milk it.
- Why do sharks not like oysters? They’re shellfish.
- Did you hear about the shark ghost? It vanished into fin air.
- Why don’t sharks like fast food? Because they can’t catch it.
- Why did the shark get sent to jail? He was involved with some fishy business.
- What did the shark say to the whale? What are you blubbering about.
- Why don’t sharks eat clowns? They taste funny.
- How do you make a shark laugh? By telling it a whale of a tale.
- What did the octopus say when it saw a shark? Oh, crab.
- What’s a shark’s favorite meal? Fish and ships.
- What sort of fish operates on a sick shark? A sturgeon.
- What’s a shark’s least favorite sweet? Jawbreakers.
- What do you call a dapper shark? So-fish-dicated.
- What’s a shark’s favorite coffee shop? Shark-bucks.
- What is even scarier to pirates than sharks? Plank-ton.
- Who delivers Christmas presents to baby sharks? Santa Jaws.
- Where can a fish borrow money? From a loan shark.
- Did you hear about the all-star shark athlete? He led his team to the chompionship.
- Why did the shark throw his clock out the ocean? He wanted to see time fly.
- How does a shark family get a vacation started? By setting the wheels in ocean.
- What did the great white shark say to the cliff jumper? Don’t worry, I’ll catch you.
- What does a happy shark say? Have a fin-tastic day.
- What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show? Shark Trek.
- What did the shark say to the surfer? Come on in, the water’s fine.
- What did the Mum shark say to the kid shark? Watch that sharkasm, young man.
- What do you call an acrobat in shark-infested waters? A balanced breakfast.
Shark one liners
Here are some great shark joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about sharks.
- Don’t trust sharks, they’ll spill your sea-crets.
- No wonder that shark doesn’t have any friends, it’s a loan shark.
- There’s a little-known, but foolproof defense against sharks. Sharks will only attack you if you’re wet.
- If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, try swimming with sharks. It costs an arm and a leg.
- A new study shows sharks only bite those who swim in the ocean. Researchers advise not swimming there.
- Save a boat. Ride a shark. It’s more eco-friendly.
- The star attraction at my local aquarium has been repossessed. Turns out it was a loan shark.
- It’s my life’s dream to see a great white shark before I die. Just not right before I die.
- I had a nightmare about being attacked by a shark. When I woke up I realized it was just a bream.
- The last ten times I’ve been to a fancy dress party I’ve gone as a shark. The joke’s wearing fin.
Best shark jokes
These next funny shark puns are some of our best jokes and puns about sharks!
- What do sharks eat for dessert? Octo-pie.
- How does a shark express disappointment? Jaw, man.
- What did the shark plead in court? Gill-ty.
- What’s a shark’s favorite card game? Go fish.
- What does a shark and a computer have in common? They both have megabites.
- What are a shark’s two most favorite words? Man overboard.
- How much does it cost to swim with sharks? An arm and a leg.
- Why are sharks hard to trust? They tell great white lies.
- What did the injured seal say to the shark? Don’t consume if seal is broken.
- What do you get when you cross a parrot with a shark? An animal that talks your head off.
Final thoughts
After reading through all these hilarious jokes about sharks, we hope you had a good laugh.
If you want to hear more funny animal puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes: