60 Funny Friend Jokes

Here are 60 funny friend jokes and the best friendship puns to crack you up. These jokes about friends are great jokes for kids and adults.

Friend puns

Here is our top list of friend dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about friendship, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this friend humor with others.

1. What has four legs and is man’s best friend? A sofa.
2. Why do trees have so many friends? They branch out.
3. What do you call a friendship between punctuation? Comma-raderie.
4. What type of chips do you eat with your BFF? Friendchips.
5. Why did the pasta call up his friend? He was feeling canneloni.

6. What do you call a skeleton with no friends? Bonely.
7. What’s the best vitamin for friendship? B1.
8. Why did the owl invite his friends over? He didn’t want to be owl by himself.
9. Why did the cannibal have no one to talk to on Friendship Day? He was taught never to play with his food.
10. Why was the tomato rushing to buy himself a motorcycle? Because he wanted to ketchup with his friends.

11. Do you want a stable friendship? Get a horse.
12. What do you call a boat full of buddies? A friendship.
13. What do Batman’s friends say to him when he returns from vacation? Welcome, Bat.
14. How are friendship and peeing in your pants similar? Everyone around you can see it but only you can feel the warmth it brings.
15. What is a meaning of a true friend? One who remembers your birthday but not your age.

16. Who has friends for dinner? A cannibal.
17. What dinosaur is a writer’s best friend? Thesaurus.
18. What do you call two male friend roses? B-rose.
19. How did the sheep get to sleep? She counted her friends.
20. What do you say to your single friends on Valentine’s Day? Happy Independence Day.

21. Why are good friends like rainbows? Because they always show their true colors.
22. What did the salad say to the pineapple? Lettuce be friends.
23. Why did the celebrity egg start losing her friends? They called her a shell-out.
24. How did the salt’s friend survive the apocalypse? She was a doomsday pepper.
25. Why did the pupil decide to end his friendship with the eyelid? Because she had a habit of lashing out.

Friend one liners

Here are some great friend joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about friendship.

26. Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.
27. If you really want to sing with a friend. Just duet.
28. I just got off work at the umbrella factory. I was only covering for my friend.
29. True friendship: Walking into a persons house and your wifi connects automatically.
30. My buddy didn’t let me on his boat because I’m too muscular. I thought it was a strong friendship.

31. I love my pet rock. Our friendship is solid.
32. Only real friends tell you when your face is dirty.
33. If you have friends as weird as you, then you have everything.
34. Real friendship is when your friend comes over to your house and then you both just take a nap.
35. Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean. But the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face.

36. Marriage: a friendship recognized by the police.
37. I love that our effortless friendship fits perfectly with my laziness.
38. Friends buy you lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.
39. My friend told me they love normal type Pokémon the most. Ditto.
40. There is nothing better than a friend. Unless it’s a friend with chocolate.

41. I bought a friend a fire extinguisher. He was de-lighted.
42. My friend and I were a donkey for Halloween. We just half-assed our costumes.
43. My friend said I’m starting to annoy her because I relate everything to Batman. What a Joker.
44. My friend was born without eyebrows. When I finally noticed after years of friendship he wasn’t surprised.
45. A friend of mine is a knot theorist and I told him a joke that wasn’t about knot theory. He said he’s too old for not-knot jokes.

46. My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
47. Friend of mine rented a farm vehicle but got ripped off.  It was a con-tractor.
48. I’m going to tell my Gen Z friend a joke about Social Security. But he probably won’t get it.
49. The spoon and the fork used to be good friends. But their friendship ended when the fork realized the spoon kept stirring things.
50. So my friend decided to get a face tattoo of her favorite Star Wars character. You should’ve seen the Luke on her face.

Best friend jokes

These next funny friend puns are some of our best jokes and puns about friends!

51. What do you call small friendship? Friendboat.
52. What do you call a fish that doesn’t have any friends? A loan shark.
53. What’s the worst way to end a friendship with a pet rock? Take them for granite.
54. Why are robot mechanics never lonely? They’re always making new friends.
55. Why did Brian have to end his friendship with a vampire? He was a pain in the neck.

56. Nothing beats friendship. Except a friend iceberg.
57. I was about to tell a bowling joke to a friend. They said ‘spare me.
58. Told my vegan friend to stop with the puns. She said oh kale no.
59. My friend brought me a large rocket for bonfire night. I was over the moon.
60. Why can’t Harry Potter tell the difference between his potions pot and his best friend? They’re both cauldron.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about friends, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

• Colonoscopy jokes
• Fart puns
• Jokes about poop
• Boomer jokes for kids