100 Jokes About Flowers

Here are 100 funny flower jokes and the best flower puns to crack you up. These jokes about flowers are great flower jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of flower dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about flowers, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this flower humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of smiling flower in pot on blue background.

Flower puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about flowers that are also awesome flower jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. What is a frog‘s favorite flower?  Croak-us.
  2. What is Spring’s favorite kind of pickles? Daffo-dills.
  3. What kind of flower grows on your face? Tulips.
  4. Where do roses sleep at night? In their flowerbed.
  5. Which flower talks the most? Tulips, because they have two lips.
  1. What kind of flowers do you take to a Smooch concert? Tulips.
  2. How do you know you’re in love with a flower? Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
  3. What is the best flower for a son? Sunflower.
  4. How much does a rose love its family? A bunch.
  5. Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband? She told him once and floral.
  1. What does the youngest flower child say? Last bud not least.
  2. Why do flowers always drive so fast? They put the petal to the metal.
  3. What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle? They rose.
  4. What do you call an inn opened by a flower and a chef? A bud and breakfast.
  5. Why did the gardener plant light bulbs? He wanted to have a power plant.
  1. What is the favorite Journey song of the flowers? Don’t stop be-leafing.
  2. How much does any flower love all of its friends? They love them bunches.
  3. What did the flower do when he gets caught in his lie? Backpetals.
  4. What do the flowers call their grandfathers? Poppy.
  5. What did the one flower say when she wanted a second chance? Trust me, I’ll grow on you.
  1. What was the most common line said by Jerry Maguire the flower? You had me at heliconia.
  2. Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower? It’s a budding romance.
  3. Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together? He just needed a kick in the bud.
  4. What do cartographers give their sweethearts on Valentine’s Day? Compass rose.
  5. What do you get if you cross a bike and a flower? Bicycle petals.
Cartoon graphic smiling flower with yellow face of on blue background.
  1. What did the fan wildflower said to the famous actor flower? I’m wild about you.
  2. What did the music teacher say to the new flower student in her class? Don’t sing out of Petunia.
  3. What would you do if you couldn’t decide whether to plant some flowers or pave a part of your garden? I would try to sort it once and floral.
  4. What do florists hang on their doors for people to ring when they come to visit? Bellflowers.
  5. What is the favorite band of the flower? It’s Guns n’ Roses.
  1. What do all the flowers say as motivation every morning? Thistle be a beautiful day.
  2. What did the flower say to his wife? Every daisy is better with you.
  3. What was written on the Mother’s Day card that the little flower gave to her mother on a special occasion? I’m lucky to be y-orchid.
  4. What happened when the flower got called up to fix the mess his colleagues made at work? He rose to the occasion.
  5. What did the flower lawyer say when it lost the case? It said, “Every dogwood has its day.
  1. What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job? Take it or leaf it.
  2. What is a bee’s favorite type of flower? A Bee-gonia.
  3. What did the bee tell the flower? Hello noney.
  4. What do Australians use for their sunburn? Aloe, mate.
  5. What does a flower therapist ask her patients? Are you feeling bouquet?
  1. How do two flowers greet each other? Hey bud, how’s it growing?
  2. What do you call a French baker’s favourite flower? Croissanthemum.
  3. What do you get if you cross a sheepdog and a rose? A collie-flower
  4. What did the bank-robbing flower say to its getaway driver? Floret.
  5. What’s Miley Cyrus’ alter ego in the flower world? Hannah Lantana.
  1. What do you call a half price bunch of daffodils? A daffodeal!
  2. What did the one flower at the school say to the new flower kid that just got transferred? You seem cool. I lilac you.
  3. Have you heard about the fear of roses Brian has? He says it’s a thorny issue, and he’s not sure about where it stems from.
  4. Have you heard about the flower that recently joined a dating app? I think he is just looking for some-bud-y to love.
  5. Why is the letter A like a flower?  Because a “B” comes after it.
  1. What do you say to a pensive flower? A peony for your thoughts?
  2. What did the girl cactus say to the boy cactus?  I am so glad we pricked each other.
  3. What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance? I’ll grow on you.
  4. Why are flowers so lazy? Because they’re always in a bed.
  5. What did the flower say after he told a joke? I was just pollen your leg.
  1. What’s the fiercest type of flower? A dandelion.
  2. How does a flower whistle? By using its tulips.
  3. Where do flowers go when they need to recharge after a long day? The power plant.
  4. How do you know flowers are capable of kissing? They have tulips.
  5. What do flowers study in college? Stem.
Cartoon graphic of pink flower with face on blue background.

Flower one liners

Here are some great flower joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about flowers.

  1. My vase of flowers died, but then they came back to life. It must have been reincarnation.
  2. For Valentine’s Day I received a bunch of flowers with the heads cut off. I think I was being stalked.
  3. My wife complains that I never buy her flowers. I didn’t even know she sold them.
  1. Every daisy is better with you.
  2. Are you feeling bouquet?
  3. I’m telling you, once and floral.
  4. Looks like someone rose to the occasion.
  5. Let the good thymes roll.
  1. You have put me in an orchid position.
  2. You are dandy. I’m not lion.
  3. Iris you a very happy birthday.
  4. My love for you blossoms every day.
  5. I love flower-less cake.
  1. Begonia. Don’t stay.
  2. Don’t stop beleafing.
  3. I think of you everydaisy.
  4. What a re-leaf.
  5. I wasn’t all that interested in flowers, but I planted a few seeds, and they grew on me.
  1. Best buds forever.
  2. Advice from a sunflower: Be outstanding in your field.
  3. I’m not orchid-ing when I say you’re a great mom.
  4. You’re the best mom ever, Orchid you not.
  5. There flowers are burning! Find a fire hydrangea.
  1. Line the flowers up in columns, not rose.
  2. She had no sense of urgency; she was lacka-daisy-cal.
  3. They’re not my kids, they’re y-orchids.
  4. She was experiencing spells of daisyness.
  5. She wanted to cover her head so she just put on a bluebonnet.
Cartoon graphic of 3 flowers with faces in a pot on blue background.

Best flower jokes

These next funny flower puns are some of our best jokes and puns about flowers!

  1. Why did the rose stop dating the sunflower? She only saw him as a frond.
  2. What do you say when you want a flower to drive faster? Floret.
  3. I heard you were in a thorny situation, but I’m sure you’ll come out of it smelling like a rose.
  4. Roses are so friendly because they always thank you a bunch.
  5. What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower? You had me at hydrangea.
  1. Why didn’t the flower get a second date? He was a garden variety.
  2. How do two flowers greet each other? Hey bud, how’s it growing?
  3. What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help? Lilac the ability to stop.
  4. What did the flower write in his mother’s day card? I’m proud to be orchid.
  5. How do you impress a baker when you’re taking his daughter on a date? Bring her flours.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about flowers, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny plant jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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