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40 Funny Cricket Jokes

Here are 40 funny cricket jokes and the best cricket puns to crack you up. These jokes about cricket are great jokes for kids and adults.

Cartoon graphic of a cricket batsman hitting a cricket ball by the wickets on blue background.

Cricket puns

Here is our top list of cricket dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about cricket, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this cricket humor with others.

  1. Why couldn’t Robin play cricket? Because he lost his bat, man.
  2. What did the wicketkeeper say to the ball as it flew past his ear? Bye.
  3. Why did the cricketer bring a string to the game? So that he could ‘tie’ the score.
  4. Why did the cricket team need a flamethrower? Because they lost all of their matches.
  5. Why are cricketers so good at ironing clothes? Because they know how to spot a crease.
  1. Why did the stump marry the ball? She bowled him over.
  2. Why did the Vampire stop playing cricket? He couldn’t find his bat.
  3. What does a cricket player and a car salesmen have in common? They’re both good with the pitch.
  4. Why can’t Australian cricketers drink wine? Because they haven’t got any openers.
  5. Why didn’t the lazy postman get picked for the cricket team? Because of all his slow deliveries.
Cartoon graphic of a cricket ball on fire on blue background.
  1. What do sheep love most about cricket? Going in to baa-t.
  2. What birds are not welcome at a cricket match? Ducks.
  3. Why are singers also good cricketers? Because they are good with the pitch.
  4. How does a cricketer teach his kids ABC? A for appeal, B for bowl, C for caught.
  5. Why should you never drive a car like a cricketer? Because then you will hit and run.
  1. Why did the cricket bowler never sweat? He was surrounded by fans.
  2. Why don’t grasshoppers watch soccer? They prefer cricket.
  3. Why couldn’t Cinderella play cricket? She always ran away from the ball.
  4. When should a cricket player wear armor? When he plays Knight games.
  5. What does a cricket bowler have in common with a magician? They both can do hat tricks.
Cartoon graphic of an Australian cricket batsman hitting a cricket ball by the wickets on blue background.

Cricket one liners

Here are some great cricket joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about cricket.

  1. Cricket matches can last for days. No rest for the wicket, I suppose.
  2. The English cricket team never have to have a covid vaccine because they never catch anything.
  3. Doctor, doctor. They’ve dropped me from the cricket team, they call me butterfingers. Don’t worry, what you have is not catching.
  4. I spent $80 taking my son to see the cricket today.  Eighty bucks, and all it did was hop and chirp.
  5. This guy explained to me his idea of a cricket field lit using LED lights. It was quite an interesting pitch.
  1. Our local cricket club applied to the town council for a grant. They got Hugh.
  2. I have a friend who is a retired cricket umpire. And he doesn’t lift a finger now.
  3. I was sitting in the park watching cricket. And then it jumped into my eye.
  4. I recently played in a Star Wars themed cricket match. Every time the ball was delivered the umpire struck back.
  5. I’m going to apply for the job as Australia’s next cricket captain. I’ve been ball tampering for years and never got caught.
Cartoon graphic of a cricket ball knocking off the stumps of the wickets on blue background.

Best cricket jokes

These next funny cricket puns are some of our best jokes and puns about cricket!

  1. How do cricket players search for things online? They Googly it.
  2. What do you call an undead cricket referee? A vumpire.
  3. How did the illegal cricketer get arrested? He was caught at the boundary.
  4. Why was the batsman’s delivery left on his doorstep? He was out.
  5. Why are there floodlights on cricket grounds?  Because bats are nocturnal.
  1. After watching cricket for four hours today. I realized that it uses legs to make noise.
  2. Why are deep fielders so dignified? They know their boundaries.
  3. What did the conductor say to the bus full of cricketers? Wickets, please.
  4. I kept wondering why the cricket ball kept getting bigger and bigger. And then it hit me.
  5. I put together a cricket team, but they didn’t do very well. They kept getting squished by the ball.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about cricket, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny sport puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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