60 Jokes About Balloons

Here are 60 funny balloon jokes and the best balloon puns to crack you up. These jokes about balloons are great balloon jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of balloon dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about balloons, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this balloon humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of blue balloon dog on blue background.

Balloon puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about balloons that are also awesome balloon jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. Why couldn’t the birthday clown make balloon animals for the children? With the rising cost of inflation he couldn’t afford it anymore.
  2. How do balloons trip up? They fall float on their face.
  3. Why did the cold air balloon business fail? It had trouble getting off the ground.
  4. How do you propose with a helium balloon? You pop the question.
  5. What do you do for a sick balloon? You helium up.
  1. How do suicidal balloons greet each other? What’s popping?
  2. Do you want to hear a joke about a balloon? Too late it just got away from me.
  3. Why are old balloons cheaper than new balloons? Because of inflation.
  4. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? She’ll let it go.
  5. What do you call a balloon animal made out of a condom? A Trojan horse.
  1. What music are balloons scared of? Pop music.
  2. What did the balloon say to the doctor? I feel light headed.
  3. What did a balloon say to another balloon? Be careful with the cactussssssssssss.
  4. What grows when you squeeze it, explodes if you rub it too hard, and children love it? A balloon animal.
  5. Did you know that, with enough pressure, the human lung will burst like a balloon? Anyway, I lost my medical license today.
Cartoon graphic of 5 balloons one with a smiling faceon blue background.
  1. What does a hot air balloon and a homeless person have in common? No visible means of support.
  2. What do you get when you take a needle to a balloon filled with yogurt? Pop culture.
  3. What’s it like to work for a hot air balloon company? It has its ups and downs.
  4. What sort of music is bad for balloons? Pop.
  5. What did the needle say to the balloon? I am the king of pop.
  1. What do you put in a female balloon? Shelium.
  2. What was the last thing the balloon said to his father? Watch me, pop.
  3. How did the clown ruin his balloon business? He blew everything out of proportion.
  4. Did anyone hear about that country who started using balloons as currency? They ended up with a massive inflation problem.
  5. What kind of music do balloons hate? Pop.
  1. Why are balloons expensive? Inflation. I’ll see myself out, unless this blows up.
  2. What did one balloon say to the other when it proposed? You blow me away.
  3. How did the balloon feel after I rubbed it on my hair? Ecstatic.
  4. How are a hobo and a balloon alike? Both are without visible means of support.
  5. Which is the luxury fashion house that makes balloons? Only Balloon-ciaga.
Cartoon graphic of hot air balloon on blue background.

Balloon one liners

Here are some great balloon joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about balloons.

  1. A friend of mine owned a balloon company, but sadly he had to close it. Couldn’t keep up with the cost of inflation.
  2. For the first time in my life I can walk past a balloon and it doesn’t stick to me. I’m absolutely ex-static.
  3. Finding a balloon with no strings attached can be hard.
  4. A friend of mine did an awful version of an 80s Classic at karaoke. It went down like 99 lead balloons.
  5. Instead of a blue or pink balloon for a gender reveal. A piggy bank should be smashed revealing $1 for a boy or 78 cents for a girl.
  1. I’m not sure whether to quit my job making hot air balloons. It’s all a bit up in the air at the moment.
  2. My plans for a helium balloon company struggled to get off the ground.
  3. I shouldn’t have bought balloons from a salesman with commitment issues. There were no strings attached.
  4. So I was sucking a helium balloon and was like He He He.
  5. A clown had an interview for a party supplies store where they had to inflate a balloon as a test. He blew it.
  1. I started a cold air balloon business. I’m having trouble getting it off the ground.
  2. My girlfriend came to me with a balloon that said, “Will you marry me?” So I popped the question.
  3. I spent $100 on balloons for my birthday party. But on the bill they charged me $200 due to inflation.
  4. So it appears the first person who offered me a job as a hot air balloon instructor was talking a lot of hot air.
  5. I saw a lion get in a hot air balloon basket. It caused quite the uproar.
  1. I have to confess my karaoke attempt didn’t go well last night. It went down like 99 lead balloons.
  2. I invented a cold air balloon, but it didn’t really take off.
  3. I know someone who was going to propose using a helium balloon. He popped the question.
  4. My balloon elephant wouldn’t fit in my backseat. So I had to pop the trunk.
  5. I want to offer Cold Air Balloon rides for people afraid of heights.
Cartoon graphic of silly pink balloon face on blue background.

Best balloon jokes

These next funny balloon puns are some of our best jokes and puns about balloons!

  1. What’s a balloons least favourite activity? A pop quiz.
  2. What do you call a crazy balloon? A balloonatic.
  3. What should you do if you are offered a free hot air balloon ride? Take them up in their offer.
  4. Why should you keep your money away from balloons? It may be affected by inflation.
  5. Did you hear about the new balloon tax? They’re going to tax them to new heights.
  1. What do you call a Dad balloon that disappears? Pops.
  2. What did the cactus say to the balloon? Nothing, they can’t talk.
  3. Why were there balloons in the bathroom? There was a birthday potty.
  4. What did one balloon say to the other during the quiz? Your gas is as good as mine.
  5. What do you call a helium balloon shaped like Albert Einstein? A stable genius.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about balloons, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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