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40 Funny Short People Jokes

ByChe Lewis

Here are 40 funny short people jokes and the best short people puns to crack you up. These jokes about short people are great jokes for kids and adults.

Cartoon graphic of a short person looking sad while measuring themselves on a blue background.

Short people puns

Here is our top list of short people dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about short people, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this short people humor with others.

  1. What kind of biscuit does a short person prefer? Shortbread.
  2. What did the short person experience from a tall person? Belittlement.
  3. Why are gnome jokes all one-liners? They are always rather short.
  4. Why was the short prisoner thrown into the sea? He was a little condescending.
  5. Why was the builder so short? Because he had been contracting for a long time.
  1. What do you call a short comedian? A little funny.
  2. What’s the most exciting height to be? Yay high.
  3. What do you call it when a short person waves at you? A microwave.
  4. Why did the short chef quit his job at the casino? The steaks were too high.
  5. Why did the taller fisherman tell better fish stories than his shorter buddy? Cause his arms are longer.
  1. Why was the king only a foot tall? Because he was a ruler.
  2. What type of milk can one get from a short cow? Condensed milk.
  3. How did the leprechaun beat the Irish man to the pot of gold? He took a short cut.
  4. Want to hear the joke about a little person? Never mind, it’s too short.
  5. Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda to borrow some money? Because he’s always short.
Cartoon graphic of a short person standing on her school books while measuring herself on a blue background.

Short people one liners

Here are some great short people joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about short people.

  1. Appreciate the little things. Give a short person a hug.
  2. Do you know what always catches my eye? Short people with umbrellas.
  3. You’ve really got to hand it to short people because they usually can’t reach it anyway.
  4. Every time a tall person bumps their head, somewhere a short person is smiling.
  5. Why did the short guy drop out of college? Because he couldn’t reach higher education.
  1. I want to buy platform shoes, but I can’t afford them. I’m still a little short.
  2. I’m not saying short people are inferior but I do look down on them.
  3. Short people have a hard time raising a family. They really struggle to put food on the table.
  4. My dad moved in some very mysterious circles. He had one leg shorter than the other.
  5. One of the legs of this chair is shorter than the others. I’m trying to be okay with it but if I’m being honest it just doesn’t sit well with me.
  1. Short people are always sad because they can never reach happiness.
  2. I realized today I reached my ideal weight years ago. I just haven’t reached my ideal height of 6’3″ yet.
  3. God only lets things grow until they are perfect. Some of us didn’t take as long as others. – Short People.
  4. My wife said she had trouble hitting the high notes in a karaoke song. Apparently she was too short and didn’t have the right shoes on.
  5. I know joking about Tom Cruise’s height is low-hanging fruit, but that’s all he can reach.
Cartoon graphic of a short person wearing oversized clothes on a blue background.

Best short people jokes

These next funny short people puns are some of our best jokes and puns about short people!

  1. I love short people. They’re more down to earth.
  2. Never fight short people. They hit below the belt.
  3. I don’t think short people are very mature. They still have a lot of growing up to do.
  4. Sometimes when I look at short people I wonder. If they’re able to reach their goals.
  5. “Keep looking up.” Motivational advice for most people. Necessary advice for short people.
  1. Height bullying is no joke. Seriously, we need to stop looking down on short people.
  2. Just played miniature golf with a short person. But she just called it golf.
  3. I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today. A really short man got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.” I said, “Well which one are you then?
  4. I was shocked to read in the papers today that a short person had been pickpocketed. I just thought to myself “How could someone stoop so low?”
Cartoon graphic of a short person standing on books getting measured by his mum on a blue background.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about short people, we hope you had a good laugh. As a little extra, the song “Short People” by Randy Newman is a classic song that we really wanted to share!

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

Hi! I'm Che, and I hope you enjoy these jokes as much as me. These jokes lists are curated by me alone. I handpick the jokes for quality, create some myself or add ones that have been contributed by readers like you.

I constantly update Here's A Joke posts to ensure top quality. Not feeling a joke or got one to share? Let me know in the comments or contact me. With your support, I'm aiming for the best joke site around.

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