15 Best Raccoon Puns

Here are 15 funny raccoon jokes and the best raccoon puns to crack you up. These jokes about raccoons are great jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of raccoon dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about raccoons, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this raccoon humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of a raccoon standing inside a rubbish bin with its hands in the air and another sleeping next to the trash on a blue background.

Raccoon puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about raccoons that are also awesome raccoon jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. What do raccoons eat? Junk food.
  2. What’s invisible and smells like trash? Raccoonn farts.
  3. What car does a raccoon drive? A Furrari.
  4. What do you call a raccoon covered in pasta sauce? A ragu-un.
  5. Why did the raccoon take a culinary class? Because she was sick of eating trash.
Cartoon graphic of a raccoon sitting and smiling on a blue background.

Raccoon one liners

Here are some great raccoon joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about raccoons.

  1. A group of raccoons in your house can be fur-midable.
  2. The raccoon recently broke up with her partner because he was too trashy.
  3. A vulture tries to get on an airplane with a raccoon under each wing. The pilot stops him saying, “Sorry, you’re only allowed one carry-on.”
  4. I saw a raccoon with a sewing machine, I asked my wife “Does that raccoon know how to sew?” She said, “That’s how it seams”.
  5. A man in a movie theater sees a raccoon sitting next to him. “What are you doing here?” asks the man. The raccoon says, “I read the book.
Cartoon graphic of a raccoon in a trash bin with two others looking at trash on a blue background.

Best raccoon jokes

These next funny raccoon puns are some of our best jokes and puns about raccoons!

  1. Why do raccoons get fat? Because their diet is trash.
  2. Why aren’t raccoons afraid of the rain? Because they’re made out of hats.
  3. Why did the raccoon cross the road? To prove to the possum that it could be done.
  4. Who would win at scrabble between a squirrel and a raccoon? The squirrel, it has a Q in it.
  5. How do raccoons decide on where to get dinner? They look for raccoon-mendations,
Cartoon graphic of a raccoon drinking coffee from a latte cup on a blue background.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about raccoons, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more silly animal puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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