Funny Jokes About Hair

Here is a list of funny hair jokes and hair puns to crack you up. If you’ve got any good and clean hair jokes to add, comment them below!

Hair puns

These hair puns use simple word play, and they can easily be tweaked to make the joke your own!

1. What did the hairbrush say to its friend? Comb over hair.
2. What did the bald man say to himself in the mirror? What do we have hair?
3. What do witches put in their hair? Scare spray.
4. Why was Pavlov’s hair so messy? Because he didn’t condition it.
5. Who’s a hairdresser’s favorite musical artist? Hairry Styles.

6. What do you call a hairless poodle? A noodle.
7. What happened when the famous wig robber was seen in the area? The police started combing the area.
8. Why doesn’t the moon shave? Because it waxes.
9. What happened when the barber cleaned his shop? The barber felt a breath of fresh hair.
10. How did the young lad feel about his first haircut? He didn’t like it at first, but then it grew on him.

11. Where do people in Antarctica get their hair cut? At the brrr-brrr shop.
12. What’s the bird trainer’s favorite hairstyle? A mo-hawk.
13. What’s a bee’s favorite haircut? A buzzcut.
14. How did the one hair propose to the other? I love you unconditionally.
15. What does your barber call a bad comb-over? Hair-layer-ious.

16. Why are hairdressers never late for work? They know all the short cuts.
17. What type of haircut does Steven Spielberg get? The director’s cut.
18. What do ghosts use to wash their hair? Shamboo.
19. What do you say when a magician makes a bunch of hair disappear? You say, it vanished into thin hair.
20. What is the kind of hair that loves going on vacation on different beaches? The wavy hair.

21. Which movie franchise is the favorite for most barbers? Hairy Potter.
22. Where do horses go to get their hair styled and cut? The state of Maine.
23. Which exclusive hair salon does Bruce Willis visit in Hollywood? Dye Hard.
24. Why do all types of bees in the world have hair that is sticky? This is because they always honeycomb their hair.
25. What kind of facial hair should a sea captain have? A boatee.

More hair jokes

There are a few jokes hair here for you to choose from!

26. Why was the barbershop located on the hill slope so trendy among people? This was because it was a cut above the rest.
27. Why did the fortune teller decide to get their hair done on Wednesday? She read it in her hairoscope.
28. Oh look said the hair when it got to the cross roads? Split ends.
29. What haircut can people not stop raving about? The buzz cut.
30. What is the name of the natural hairstyle that most birds prefer to have? They prefer to have the mo-hawk.

31. What kind of hair explodes? Bangs.
32. What did the HVACR techinician use to moisturise his hair? Air conditioner.
33. What did a bald historian say when he found an antique comb in the ruins? He said that he was never going to part with it.
34. Where did the sheep get a haircut? At the baa-baa shop.
35. What is a butcher’s favorite facial hair style? Mutton chops.

36. What type of hairstyle is popular with polar bears? Frosted tips.
37. Why do hairstylists frequent the gym? They love doing curls.
38. What do you call a cow’s facial hair? A moo-stache.
39. What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face? A mouse-tache!
40. How do hairdressers travel? With United Hairlines.

Hair jokes continued

41. Did you hear about the dance for wigs? It’s the hairball.
42. Why doesn’t The Hulk need to style his hair? Because it lays perfectly still out of sheer terror.
43. Why did the barber shop close at 2 p.m.? Because work was cut short today.
44. What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barberqueue.
45. Why do people prefer to watch sports matches while visiting the barbershop? Although the coverage is the same, the highlights are way better.

46. What do ghosts use to wash their hair? Shamboo.
47. How do newscasters prefer to keep their hair? In a short wave.
48. What do you tell a hairdresser who looks very sure of his own abilities? We say that he is trimming with confidence.
49. Why can vampires not do their hair themselves? This is because they cannot see their own reflection.
50. What was the name of the hair salon next to the graveyard? Curl Up and Dye.

51. What should we name a bee who is having terrible hair problems? A frizz-bee.
52. Why was the hairbrush angry? It was always bristly.
53. What kind of hairstyle does a dairy farmer have? A cow lick.

Hair one liners

Here are some great hair jokes one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about hair.

54. I used to dislike my hair, but it’s growing on me.
55. Two hairdressers I know just got married: they live in peace and hair-mony.
56. My wavy hair will be offended if you don’t wave back.
57. I just changed my name and cut my hair I am no longer Harry.

58. Barbers also make excellent cab drivers, because they know every short cut in town.
59. She got fired from the hot dog stand for putting her hair in a bun.
60. Hold on, this salon looks familiar – I think I’ve been hair before.

63. Grey hair is hereditary , you get it from your children.
64. The training week for hairdressers is called root camp.
65. My wife is leaving me because I’m balding It’s fine.. it’s “hair” loss.

Best hair jokes

These next funny hair puns are some of our best jokes and puns about hair!

91. What is the one hairstyle that will last forever? A perm-anent one.
92. How can the moon cut its own hair? Eclipse it.
93. What kind of hair do you cut with keys? Dread-locks.
94. Did you hear about the hair that got fired? It got the chop.
95. What’s a blondes favorite band? The bleach boys.

96. Did you hear about the hair that was very successful? It went to great lengths.
97. Did you know Conan was a hairdresser? He was Conan the Barberarian.
98. What was the reason that a banana visited a hairstylist? It had split ends.
99. What kind of hairline does a spider have? A widows peak.
100. Do you know what happens at 5 o’clock and all the hair wants to go home? It’s brush hour.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about hair, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny anatomy jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

• Feet jokes
• Ears puns
• Jokes about brains
• Bones jokes for kids