45 Jokes About Keys

Here are 45 funny key jokes and the best key puns to crack you up. These jokes about keys are great key jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of key dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about keys, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this key humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of golden key on blue background.

Key puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about keys that are also awesome key jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. What do you use to open a Haunted House? A spoo-key.
  2. Why didn’t the car key fit in at the party? She was too door-key.
  3. What’s the main purpose of a key ring? To help you lose all your keys at once.
  4. Why is it difficult to open a piano? Because the keys are located on the inside.
  5. What’s a aliens favorite computer key? The space bar!
  1. What do you call a drunk person fumbling with their car keys? An taxi.
  2. Why wasn’t the piano entering the house? It didn’t know which key to use.
  3. What type of keys are sweet? Cookies.
  4. What type of key opens a banana? A monkey.
  5. Why did the Escape key want to leave? Because it kept being repressed.
Cartoon graphic of car key doing thumbs up sign on blue background.
  1. Why do I not like car keys that much? They always try to start something.
  2. Why do violists stand for long periods outside of peoples houses? They can’t find the key and don’t know when to come in.
  3. What did the girl do when she found her laptop had a missing a key? She lost ctrl.
  4. Why do keyboards never sleep? Because they have two shifts.
  5. What is the only key a piano can play in after it was dropped down the mine shaft? Minor B flat.
  1. Which keyboard key do pirates love? Rrr maybe, but it maybe the C.
  2. What should you do when you lock yourself outside your house? Talk to the lock since communication is key.
  3. What’s a pianist’s favorite location for a vacation? The Florida Keys.
  4. What’s the key ingredient to a perfect Thanksgiving dinner? A Turkey.
  5. How do you make a computer keyboard sad? You make the key “D” pressed.
  1. Which keyboard key does a lazy worker hate the most? The shift key.
  2. Why have I removed all the black keys from my piano? I intend to C Major improvement.
  3. What type of key do boney people use to unlock their houses? Skeleton keys.
  4. Why did the fish sing off key? Because it was not possible to tuna them.
  5. Why is it simple to sneak into Florida? Because there are plenty of keys.
Cartoon graphic of 2 golden keys on blue background.

Key one liners

Here are some great key joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about keys.

  1. A hacker stole my Microsoft Office license key. I told him, “I’ll find you, and you’ll pay for what you’ve done. You have my Word.”
  2. The reason that they are called car keys is that they can be rather hard to find.
  3. When I stayed up all night searching for my keys. Then it dawned on me.
  4. The ghost took all the keys off my keyboard. I’m totally out of control and there is no escape.
  5. Thor is usually high strung. His brother, on the other hand, is Loki.
  1. Saw a spider crawling across the keys on my keyboard but it’s under Ctrl now.
  2. My laptop is missing a key. I lost ctrl.
  3. A thief took my Microsoft Office license key. I’ll find that thief, you have my Word
  4. I’m writing a song about getting my door lock replaced. There’s a key change at the end.
  5. Saw a 70s television programme about two detectives who solve crimes over the phone. Star Key and Hash.
Cartoon graphic of key with face and doing the ok sign on blue background.

Best key jokes

These next funny key puns are some of our best jokes and puns about keys!

  1. Why did the car key never fit in? He was too door key.
  2. How does a horse open a door? With a donkey.
  3. Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop? I think it got lockjaw after that.
  4. What kind of key makes it difficult to open your front door? Whiskey.
  5. Why was the pianist banging her head against the keys? She was playing by ear.
  1. My friend is a key worker. He picks locks.
  2. My F5 key has a lovely smell. It’s very refreshing.
  3. My friend is writing a song about getting his door lock replaced. There’s a key change at the end.
  4. A bald chap I know never uses keys now. He’s lost his locks.
  5. I developed an addiction to pressing the F1 key on my laptop. I’m trying to get help.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about keys, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny random jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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