55 Funny Salad Puns

Here are 55 funny salad jokes and the best salad puns to crack you up. These jokes about salad are great jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of salad dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about salad, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this salad humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of a smiling woman eating a salad at the table on a blue background.

Salad puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about salad that are also awesome salad jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. Is it safe to eat salad? It romaines to be seen.
  2. What did the artichoke say to the man eating a salad? Have a heart.
  3. What is a penguin’s favorite salad? Iceberg lettuce.
  4. What novels do salads love? Romaine-ce novels.
  5. What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of lettuce? Chicken sees a salad.
  1. Where do salads try on clothes? The dressing room.
  2. Why don’t pine trees eat salad? Because they’re coniferous.
  3. What’s an atom’s favorite salad topping? Croutons.
  4. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
  5. Why should you never smoke at a salad bar? Because you might ignite the rocket.
  1. What did the salad say to the chef? Lettuce go.
  2. Where did the spinach go to have a few drinks? The salad bar.
  3. What does a posh salad say before it’s eaten? Kelp.
  4. What kind of salad do termites eat? House salad.
  5. What kind of fruit salad is most resistant to sunburn? The kind with extra melon in.
Cartoon graphic of a smiling bowl of salad on a blue background.
  1. How do you make a salad very cold? Use iceberg lettuce.
  2. What do bandages like to put on their salad? A wound dressing.
  3. What do you do with an epileptic lettuce? You make a seizure salad.
  4. Why did the salad win an award? It went above and beyond the kale of duty.
  5. Why did the cowboy ride a horse while eating salad? Because he loved the ranch.
  1. How do you kill a salad? You go for the carrot-id artery.
  2. What do you need to make a crystal salad? Avocado, tomatoes, and a whole bunch of lattice.
  3. When is it acceptable for a nose to be in a salad? When it’s a snowman’s nose.
  4. What did the pickle say when he was told he was going in to a salad? I relish the thought.
  5. Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it? In case there’s a salad dressing.
  1. Why’s it called a Caesar Salad? Because Caesar ruled the romaines.
  2. What did the sandwich say to the salad when it got locked out? Lettuce in.
  3. What do you get when you cross a sad dog and a fruit salad? A Mellon Collie.
  4. Why did the man ask his boss for more salad? He thought he was due a celery increase.
  5. Did you hear about the salad race the other day? The Lettuce was ahead, but the Tomato was trying to ketchup.
Cartoon graphic of a young girl eating a salad at the table while smiling on a blue background.

Salad one liners

Here are some great salad joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about salad.

  1. I can’t stand Greek salads. I like un-feta’d access to my greens.
  2. I didn’t take the job at the salad bar because the celery was too low.
  3. I had some leftover salad so I gave my friend the romaine-der.
  4. Scientists are saying salads will be a thing of the past. Lettuce romaine calm.
  5. After waiting an hour for my peppery starter I complained “It’s not rocket salad”.
  1. Shredded cabbage and carrot make a great salad. – Cole’s Law.
  2. I ordered a Caesar salad from the restaurant. They absolutely killed it.
  3. My family was held captive by a salad. It wouldn’t lettuce leaf.
  4. I had a salad joke but I tossed it.
  5. My DJ friend took my advice and changed his salad recipe. He dropped the beet.
  1. I made a chicken salad this morning. But she won’t eat it.
  2. If you know any good jokes about salad, lettuce know will you.
  3. I had this awful dream last night I was making a salad. I was tossing all night.
  4. I ate a salad today and it contained both eggs and chicken. I didn’t know where to start.
  5. I had to decide between making salad with my mom or playing outside with my dad. It was a toss-up.
Cartoon graphic of a bowl of salad smiling with hands and legs on a blue background.

Best salad jokes

These next funny salad puns are some of our best jokes and puns about salad!

  1. What’s a wolf’s favorite salad green? Awoooo-gula.
  2. What do beavers like to put on their salads? Branch dressing.
  3. What do you call a salad leaf that constantly works out? Shredded lettuce.
  4. What do horses like to put on their egg salad sandwiches? Mayo-neighs.
  5. What do you say at a restaurant when they ask whether you want salad or chips? I’m not taking sides.
  1. What do you call a baby lion on lettuce? Cub Salad.
  2. What did the salad say to the others? You’re so romaine-tic.
  3. What would an artichoke say to you when eating salads? Oh, you also have a heart.
  4. What did the cop say to the salad? Everyone romaine calm.
  5. Did you hear about the green salad that mysteriously disappeared? All I uncovered were the chard romaines.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about salad, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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