30 Funny Boyfriend Jokes

Here is a collection of boyfriend puns and jokes that’ll charm your heart and tickle your funny bone.

Boyfriend Puns

I’ve put together these boyfriend puns with the hope that they’ll sweep you off your feet with laughter.

Why did the shrimp break up with her boyfriend? He was really shellfish.
What do you do if your boyfriend hates fruit jokes? You let the man-go.
What do you call a construction worker with 4 boyfriends? Polyhammerus.
What’s a boyfriend’s idea of honesty in a relationship? Telling you his real name.
How do you get your boyfriend to do sit-ups? Put the remote control between his toes.

Why is Spider-Man a bad boyfriend? He’s super clingy.
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend? Because he was a boar.
Why did the mushroom break up with her boyfriend? Because he was toxic.
What do you call a man made of garbage? Your ex-boyfriend.
What does a boyfriend and mascara have in common? They both run at the first sign of emotion.

I’ve lovingly curated this selection of boyfriend one-liners, hoping they’ll steal your heart with a smile and a laugh.

I had to break up with my boyfriend over the phone. We just had no connection.
A bartender broke up with her boyfriend. He keeps asking for another shot.
I told my boyfriend to text me when he got home. He must be homeless.
My boyfriend and I always laugh about how competitive we are. But I laugh harder.
A girl saw her boyfriend flirting with other girls at the gym. She walked up to him and said, “This isn’t working out.”

I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.
My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk. How dairy.
Barbie’s boyfriend was involved in a serious car accident. So they contacted his next of Ken.
My boyfriend is in the hospital after he ate a giant bacon cheese burger. It was mine.
My boyfriend knows how understanding I am. That’s why he always calls me Miss Understanding.

Here are the best jokes about boyfriends. Let me know in the comments if you agree or if you have a favorite joke you think should make this list!

My boyfriend told me to stop impersonating flamingos. I had to put my foot down.
My boyfriend started a bee farm to help save the bees. I think he’s a keeper.
My boyfriend accidentally poked me in the eyes. So, I stopped seeing him for a while.
My boyfriend is upset that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.
Why did the astronaut break up with her boyfriend? Because she needed some space.

Do you like my shirt? It’s made out of boyfriend material.
What did the cheese say to her boyfriend? We look gouda to-feta.
What did the otter say to her boyfriend? I feel like we’re drifting apart. Maybe it’s time to see otter people.
Why did the geologist take her boyfriend to the quarry? She wanted to get a little boulder.
What is the difference between a sofa and a boyfriend watching Monday Night Football? The sofa doesn’t keep asking for beer.