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60 Jokes About Limes

Here are 60 funny lime jokes and the best lime puns to crack you up. These jokes about limes are great lime jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of lime dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about limes, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this lime humor with others.

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Cartoon graphic of smiling lime slice on blue background.

Lime puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about limes that are also awesome limes jokes for adults and kids to be told!

  1. Why did the fruit bat eat the lime? Because it had appeal.
  2. What happened to the lime boxer? He got beaten to a pulp.
  3. What does a lime sweat? Lime juice.
  4. Why are you sad after going to the shop? I went to the shop today to get lemons and limes but they didn’t have any. It was a fruitless trip
  5. Why did the lime go out with a Prune? Because he couldn’t find a date.
  1. What happens when citrus fruits work overtime? They get lime and a half
  2. What do citrus fruits use to get dates? Pickup limes.
  3. What do you do with unruly green kids? Make them do lime-out.
  4. Why was the lime fired from the juice factory? He couldn’t concentrate.
  5. Why can’t limes be pirates? They don’t get scurvy.
  1. What happens when two limes collide? They get en-tang-led!
  2. Why was the lime always on the edge? Because he had a seed of doubt planted in him.
  3. Which role in the Star Wars movie was the lime cast for? Emperor Pulpatine.
  4. What did the old lime see before it died? The grim ripe-r.
  5. Why are limes the smartest fruit? Because they can concentrate.
Cartoon graphic of cute little lime on blue background.
  1. Why did the internet pirate get scurvy? He couldn’t use Lime Wire anymore.
  2. What is a tick’s favorite fruit? Lime.
  3. What do you call the upper eighth of a lime for sale? A top-of-the-lime model.
  4. What do you call a lime with strings attached? Limewire.
  5. What did a lime and banana decide to called themselves as a stand-up duo? Key and Peele.
  1. What did the lime say when he caught an STD? I got lemonaids.
  2. What does the band Toto say when it orders a gin tonic? Hold the lime.
  3. Did you know that you can get a slice of lemon pie in cuba for $2 and in Jamaica you can get key lime pie for $1? Those are the pie rates of the carribean.
  4. What cars do rich limes ride? A lime-o.
  5. What’s a lime’s favorite recreational activity? In-lime skating
  1. Who did the lemon rob the bank with? His partner in lime.
  2. What do you call the lowest fruit on a lime tree? Sublime.
  3. What is a lime’s favorite movie? Pulp Fiction.
  4. What can a whole lime do that half a lime can never do? Look round.
  5. Why didn’t the apple and lime get married? Because fruit cantaloupe.
  1. Where does a lime go to look up information? On-lime.
  2. Why are limes so observant? They’re full of Vitamin See.
  3. What do you call a lime that opens doors? A Key Lime.
  4. Why did the lime stop running? She ran out of juice.
  5. Why did the lime visit the doctor? She wasn’t peeling well.
Cartoon graphic of smiling lime with eyes closed on blue background.

Lime one liners

Here are some great lime joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about limes.

  1. Sale on these lime puns, lime-ited time only.
  2. Once upon a lime, there was a huge castle.
  3. Sub-lime effort from that man.
  4. What a time to be a-lime.
  5. A-lime (align) those fruits with those veggies.
  1. Lime so done with this.
  2. Lime yours.
  3. Pick-up limes are cheesy.
  4. Dad jokes are sooo lime.
  5. Lime lime-ricks are the best songs.
  1. That rapper is dropping some sick limes.
  2. Time to bask in the lime-light.
  3. Juice be yourself.
  4. Peel-lieve in yourself.
  5. I couldn’t believe it either- it’s un-peel-ievable.
Cartoon graphic of winking and sitting lime on blue background.

Best lime jokes

These next funny lime puns are some of our best jokes and puns about limes!

  1. Why do limes wear sunscreen lotion? Because they peel.
  2. What do you call a lime whose job is to perform for the king? The court zest-er.
  3. Why couldn’t the lime be in the orchestra? Because he just couldn’t keep lime.
  4. Why did the lemon turn green? Because he had Lime Disease.
  5. Why was the lime depressed? Because nobody could peel his pain.
  1. Why did the lime disapprove of his daughter? Because she was a little tart.
  2. Why are limes so popular these days? They have appeal.
  3. Why did the lime turn into lime juice? It couldn’t handle the pressure.
  4. How did the lime get into an easy group at the Olympics? Because it was well seeded.
  5. Why couldn’t the lime believe that her friend had let her down? Because citrus-ted him.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about limes, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny fruit jokes then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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