30 Funny Wizard Puns

Here are 30 funny wizard jokes and the best wizard puns to crack you up. These jokes about wizards are great jokes for kids and adults.

Cartoon graphic of a wizard pointing up and holding a staff on a blue background.

Wizard puns

Here is our top list of wizard dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about wizards, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this wizard humor with others.

  1. What do you call an incompetent wizard? A bad speller
  2. What is the difference between a wizard and a warlock? Spelling.
  3. Why did the dyslexic wizard fail Hogwarts? Because he couldn’t spell.
  4. What do you call a wizard who seduces pastries? A pie-romancer.
  5. What do you call a software wizard that installs applications? The Wizard of OS.
  1. What do you call a dead wizard? A spelleton.
  2. How do you call a wizard that works with political marketing? Propagandalf.
  3. What do you have when you have 16 copies of the Wizard of Oz? The Wizard of Lb.
  4. Why don’t wizards make their witches mad? They’ll give them a cold spell.
  5. What did the hobbit say when he accidentally bumped into a wizard? Sauromon, didn’t see you there.
  1. Why are vampires like wizards? Because they’re neck-romancers
  2. What did the wizards say to the airplane? Wing-ardium Leviosa.
  3. What do you call a reptile with magic powers? A wizard.
  4. Where does a wizard eat his lunch? In the staff room.
  5. What do wizards sing when it is an ice wizards birthday? Oh, freeze a jolly good fellow.
Cartoon graphic of a wizard with both arms up in the air about to cast a spell on a blue background.

Wizard one liners

Here are some great wizard joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about wizards.

  1. A wizard’s company went bankrupt. He had to let his staff go.
  2. Witches and wizards don’t fart. They cast smells.
  3. Wizards who drink Polyjuice Potion are people two.
  4. As a wizard, I enjoy turning objects into glass. Just wanted to make that clear.
  5. The Wizard of Oz is the ultimate chick flick. It’s two chicks fighting over a pair of shoes.
Cartoon graphic of a young boy wizard casting a spell on a blue background.

Best wizard jokes

These next funny wizard puns are some of our best jokes and puns about wizards!

  1. Where do witches and wizards shop? Voldemart.
  2. What do you call a buff wizard? Dumbbell dore.
  3. What do you call a vegan wizard? A soyceror.
  4. What is a bad wizard’s favorite computer program? Spell-check.
  5. What language do wizards write in? Cursive.
  1. What do you call a wizard that uses ice magic? A blizzard.
  2. Why did the dragon love the wizard? He was a-mage-ing.
  3. What do you call a wizard that can only control axolotls? Salamancer.
  4. What do you call a wizard that fell down the stairs? Tumbledore.
  5. What do you call a wizard with a good outlook on life? An Opti-Mystic.
Cartoon graphic of a wizard holding a wooden staff with two hands on a blue background.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about wizards, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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