55 Jokes About Candles

Here are 55 funny candle jokes and the best candle puns to crack you up. These jokes about candles are great candle jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of candle dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about candles, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this candle humor with others.

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Candle puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about candles that are also awesome candle jokes for adults and kids to be told!

Where does the candle family like to visit the most? The Wax Museum.
What game is a candle best at? Wax-a-mole.
What would you call a candle that always has a savage reply? Wicked.
What would the candle say if he reached work late? He’d say, “better light than never”
How long does it take for a candle to burn out? It takes a wick minute.

What would you do if someone told you that they’d burn your present if you gave them anything stupid? I’d just buy them a candle.
Why did the boy take candles to the toilet? It’s because he wanted the birthday potty.
What would you do if you wanted more candles on your birthday cake but the store was out of them? I’d just say, “there’s always next year.
What would you get if you put a candle inside a suit of armor? I’d get a knight-light.
How did the candles give such fantastic answers? They were all enlightened.

Why does the candle always get an F in math? It’s because it’s a little light-headed.
Why did the boy take candles to the toilet? It’s because he wanted the birthday potty.
What would you get if you put a candle inside a suit of armor? I’d get a knight-light
Did you know you could light candles with pieces of dry spaghetti? Well, that’s using your noodle.
What happened when Joseph Swan came up with the idea of a light bulb? I guess a candle appeared above his head.

What did the one candle state to the match? You light up my world.
What do you do when you go to the store to buy candle holders but they don’t have any? You just buy a cake.
Why did the candles quit their job? They were all too burnt out.
What parts of fishes are used in making candles? Paraffins.
Why do we have a tradition of blowing out the candles on birthday cakes? It’s so that we don’t burn our mouth when we eat it.

Here are some great candle joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about candles.

Bought my colleague a candle extinguisher. Getting the gift, he was de-lighted.
The candle became sad because his friends blew him off.
The candle skipped eating at night. It just had a little snack. Well, that’s what’s called a light dinner.
My local football team loses more matches than when I try to light my candle.
The candles companies in our area got insurances from one bank. They called it waxident insurance.

Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.
I had a box of candles delivered to me at home yesterday. I candled them with care.
I bought my sister some candles for her room. It looked pretty lit in the dark.
There was an assassin that only used candles as his weapon. His name was John Wick.
I borrowed my friends candle without asking him first, he was incensed.

This Halloween, Gucci sold out all of their $500 scented candles. Some people seem to have so many dollars but not enough scents.
I was at a party where everyone was thinking of a game to play. Someone came up with an idea and said, “this is a candle. If you keep the candle lit, then you win. So don’t blow it”.
Four men were on a boat and had five candles. But they had nothing with them to light the candles. So they threw a candle overboard and then the whole boat became a candle lighter.
There’s a way of lighting candles even when you don’t have matches. You just have to cut a bit off of the candle, so that it becomes a little lighter.
There was a big fire in the aroma therapy candle factory. But things are a lot calmer now.

Candles were used for the first time on a birthday cake by the people who just wanted to make light of their age.
Four men were on a boat and had five candles. But they had nothing with them to light the candles. So they threw a candle overboard and then the whole boat became a candle lighter
The candle became sad because his friends blew him off.
Just Googled “how to light a candle” Got 50 million matches.
I got fired from the candle factory told them I didn’t want to work wick ends.

I met a guy who said he was from Candleville. I told him “that makes you a candle-lite, right?”
My sister used a lot of small candles for her party as decorations. Her place looks tealight-ful.
My dad was teaching me how to fix the car but I was just holding the flashlight the entire time. I guess I’ll never be able to hold a candle to him.
I wanted to start a candle making company. But my family didn’t think it would be a good idea. I kept assuring them that it makes scents.
I bought a gold-scented candle and burned it. It had a very rich aroma.

These next funny candle puns are some of our best jokes and puns about candles!

What kind of sale did the candle store have? They had a blowout sale.
What would you do if your room smelled bad? You’d just light a candle, because It just makes scents.
What did the candle say to its friend? I’m going out tonight.
What’s it called when one Candle eats another Candle? Candlebalism
How do angels light a candle? With a match made in heaven.

Why were the candle’s grades so poor? He isn’t very bright.
What is the best place to learn about candles? It’s Wickipedia.
How do you know when you’re getting old? It’s when candles cost you more than the cake.
What would you call a fraud who works in a Candle factory? A Scandle.
Why was the weak candle flickering all through the night? It was going through a sick burn.