35 Funny Kale Puns

Here are 35 funny kale jokes and the best kale puns to crack you up. These jokes about kale are great jokes for kids and adults.

Here is our top list of kale dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about kale, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this kale humor with others.

Jump to:

• Kale puns
• Kale one liners
• Best Kale jokes
• Final thoughts

Kale puns

Here are some of our favorite dad jokes about kale that are also awesome kale jokes for adults and kids to be told!

1. What do you call a vegetable with a tune? Musi-kale.
2. What type of vegetables can you find in a shell? S-kale-lops.
3. What happens when you buy too many greens?  You tip the s-kales.
4. Why is kale never lonely? Because they come in bunches.
5. What do you call a dinosaur who only eats kale, broccoli, and cauliflower? A cruciferous rex.

6. Why doesn’t Elton John like kale? Because he’s a rocketman.
7. What is a kale’s favorite movie character? Kale-o Ren.
8. What do you call greens in a mini-skirt? Dressed to kale.
9. What did the vegan say to the meat lover? I’m going to kale you.
10. What do you call a romantic comedy about vegetables? You’ve Got Kale.

Kale one liners

Here are some great kale joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about kale.

11. I love kale. Just as long as the K is silent.
12. Told my vegan friend to stop with the puns. She said oh kale no.
13. My coworker dropped some kale. There was some kaleateral damage.
14. Just started my vegan diet. They are a bit chewy, but better than kale.
15. If you drink 2 glasses of kale juice daily, it will destroy your belly fat and your desire to live too.

16. Give me a kale sometime.
17. She’s gonna kale you if you throw those away.
18. Some foods have more kale-ories than others.
19. Someone who eats kale leaves must like them a whole bunch.
20. You should try adding olive oil to Kale. It makes it much easier to slide into to the trash.

21. Everything will be o-kale.
22. All the kale plants look identi-kale.
23. This salad is kale-ing me.
24. When I travel, I get advice from the lo-kales.
25. I used to be healthy, but I just don’t kale anymore.

Best kale jokes

These next funny kale puns are some of our best jokes and puns about kale!

26. What do you call a substance made of kale? Chemi-kale.
27. What state does kale originate from? Kale-ifornia.
28. What do you call kale leaves covered in solid gold? A bunch of money.
29. What’s green, and goes up or down? An es-kale-lator.
30. Did you hear about the carrot that outran the bunny rabbit? He lived to tell the kale.

31. What is green and has tentacles? Kale-amari.
32. What do you call a very special vegetable? A miri-kale.
33. What do you call a Disney movie about vegetables? A Fairy Kale.
34. Why did the salad win an award? It went above and beyond the kale of duty.
35. What did the homicidal vegetarian say? I would kale for some salad.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about kale, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny vegetable puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

• Garlic jokes
• Salad puns
• Jokes about pickles
• Popcorn jokes for kids