50 Funny Periodic Table Jokes

Here are 50 funny periodic table jokes and the best periodic table puns to crack you up. These jokes about periodic table are great jokes for kids and adults.

Cartoon graphic of man and daughter in scientist outfits looking and smiling at the periodic table on a blue background.

Periodic Table puns

Here is our top list of periodic table dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about periodic table, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this periodic table humor with others.

  1. How often should you tell a chemistry joke? Periodically.
  2. Why is it never a good idea to steal a periodic table? Coppers always Cu.
  3. What is Chris Hemsworth’s favorite element on the periodic table? Thorium.
  4. What element in the periodic table can you not take seriously? Silly-con.
  5. Why do scientists eat lunch at separate times? Because they only have a periodic table.
  1. Are you 11 protons? Because you are sodium fine.
  2. When and where do chemists kiss? Periodically, on the table.
  3. Is silicon the same in Spanish? Si.
  4. What do you do to dead elements? You barium.
  5. Why did the chemist hang up periodic table posters everywhere? It made him feel like he was in his element.
Cartoon graphic of a scientist looking at a molecule structure from the periodic table on a table on a blue background.
  1. What did Gold say to the periodic table? “Hey you.”
  2. Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re pretty CuTe.
  3. Bro who’s periodic table is this? Bromine.
  4. Are you hydrogen? Because I can’t live without you.
  5. What do you call dinosaurs that love the periodic table of elements? Nothing. They Argon.
  1. Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.
  2. What don’t you understand about copper? It makes perfect cents.
  3. Which element on the periodic table is best at concealing itself? Hydrogen.
  4. What do you get when you mix Uranium, Nickel, Cobalt, and Radon? A UNiCoRn.
  5. Why did Chuck Norris destroy the periodic table? Because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
  1. Which element of the Periodic Table is the poorest? Antimony.
  2. What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
  3. How do two scientists break the ice? One of them says, “U and I are on the periodic table.”
  4. What do waitresses and chemists have in common? They both need to check the table periodically.
  5. What’s the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes? Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.
Cartoon graphic of atoms from the periodic table on a blue background.

Periodic Table one liners

Here are some great periodic table joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about periodic table.

  1. I was going to tell a periodic table joke but all of the good ones argon.
  2. I really love the periodic table. Well, not always, but every now and again.
  3. I was looking for sodium on the periodic table, but then it told me it was not available. (Na).
  4. I spent the weekend learning the periodic table. You might say I was really in my element.
  5. BREAKING NEWS: Scientists launch sneak attack on the periodic table…Add the element of surprise.
  1. Iron and Lead love to listen to some Heavy Metal.
  2. Why can’t I buy occasional chairs and periodic tables in the same store?
  3. The periodic table says it’s Bi. But that’s none of our bismuth.
  4. A thief thought it would be funny to steal Si from the periodic table. It was a silly con.
  5. I failed my test which involved memorizing every element in the periodic table as there was one I forgot. I came so close yet Sulphur.
  1. All the elements went to wash their dishes in the Zinc.
  2. I don’t hate the whole periodic table, just elements of it.
  3. When periodic table puns get Boron, you should start reading element jokes instead.
  4. My chemist wife refurnishes the dining room quite often. She favors periodic tables over more permanent ones.
  5. The periodic table just got one block smaller. Scientists now say Plutonium is not a real element.
Cartoon graphic of molecules from the periodic table smiling on a blue background.

Best periodic table jokes

These next funny periodic table puns are some of our best jokes and puns about periodic table!

  1. What does AH stand for in the Periodic Table? The Element of Surprise.
  2. What is Santa’s favorite element in the periodic table? Ho Ho Ho.
  3. What element on the periodic table is the tastiest? Tongue-sten.
  4. Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium hooked up last night? OMg.
  5. What’s another name for the periodic table of elements? The atoms family.
  1. Do you want to hear a joke about potassium? K.
  2. What do you call a table with dots all over it? The periodic table.
  3. Where does the periodic table go on Sundays? Mass.
  4. Did you hear about Brian’s favorite element in the periodic table? It is ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQSTUVWXYZ or, as it’s also known, R gone.
  5. Did you hear about the girl who auditioned for a musical about the periodic table? She got the lead role.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about periodic table, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes:

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